Faded Memories

Often my mom, Sybil Miner Beck would tell stories of life as she grew up in Indian Head Pennsylvania. She was from a family of six sisters and two brothers, often telling tales of living on a farm and about her siblings. As with most families, some recollections were flattering and some were not, some were amusing and others quite sad. Frequently she shared anecdotes that made her family unique. These stories and sharing songs were an integral part of the person that was my mother.

Mom told us that when a suitor for one of her older sisters would come to the house he would sing, “Miner girls won’t you come out tonight.”

Mom would often sing a ditty that would correspond to something someone said. She regaled in sharing incidents from her past. Slowly, she lost this faculty. Alzheimer’s disease ate away at her ability to recall her past. Her life and intelligence became trapped somewhere inside of her. As the disease progressed, when we would remind her of a story she once told with relish, there was no connection. She would only mumble, “If you say so,” when we’d ask, “Isn’t that right, Mom?”

Her mental capacity had been in gradual decline, but sharply turned a corner after the death of her sister Violet Bottomley. She and Violet talked on the phone every morning. While they were chatting, Violet died. I believe that incident mentally tipped Mom over the edge causing her to become mean spirited and difficult to deal with. Later as my dad Carl tried to get her to do something she didn’t want to do she threatened to stab him with a large meat fork. He couldn’t care for her at home any longer and placed her into a nursing home with care 24 hours per day.

Granddad Raymond Miner died from the disease “hardening of the arteries” with accompanying dementia. It caused him to live in the past wanting to take care of his stock that was no longer there and to deal with farm memories used to be his life. Restlessly, he’d wander the house with thoughts of chores he needed to do.

Each one of his six daughters, Rachel Peck, Cora Hyatt, Violet Bottomley, Ina Nicholson, Sybil Beck, and Cosey Brothers eventually developed Alzheimer’s disease. Was it genetic? Neither Dale nor Ted lived long enough to have exhibited symptoms of the disease. These strong, vibrant women who cared for their own families were reduced to mental invalids that needed to be cared for until they died.