Not Saying No
When
our kids asked for us to buy them something and my wife and I thought it was
unnecessary or too expensive, we wouldn’t say no. We would offer them another
option. If it was something that they really wanted we would give them a “down payment”
and a chance to earn the rest of the money. They could do chores above and
beyond their normal chores. The extra chores could be in the house, basement,
or yard, depending what needed done at the time. (If a request was
inappropriate, we would say no.)
One example was the time my son wanted a pair of “Reebok Air” basketball shoes. It was the fad and several kids either had a pair or said that they were getting a pair. He wanted the Reebok Airs too. Those shoes were the in thing and had an air bladder that could be pumped up to fit the feet snugly and were supposed to be more comfortable than other shoes.
At that time, a good pair of tennis shoes cost about twenty-five dollars and the Reeboks cost one hundred and twenty-five dollars. (My purse strings puckered at that thought.)
Andrew came to me saying, “Dad my old shoes are about worn out. They’re getting tight. I need a new pair of shoes.”
I looked and his shoes were worn and looked tight. “We’ll go to town on Saturday and get a new pair for you.”
“Dad?” he asked quietly. “Can I have a pair of the Reebok pumps?”
He brought the advertisement over to me. When I saw the price, I didn’t say no, but said, “A good pair of tennis shoes cost twenty-five dollars. I will give you two options. I will buy the regular shoes or I can give you the twenty-five dollars toward the Reeboks. If you do extra chores for me or your mom, you can earn the rest of the money for the shoes you want.”
One example was the time my son wanted a pair of “Reebok Air” basketball shoes. It was the fad and several kids either had a pair or said that they were getting a pair. He wanted the Reebok Airs too. Those shoes were the in thing and had an air bladder that could be pumped up to fit the feet snugly and were supposed to be more comfortable than other shoes.
At that time, a good pair of tennis shoes cost about twenty-five dollars and the Reeboks cost one hundred and twenty-five dollars. (My purse strings puckered at that thought.)
Andrew came to me saying, “Dad my old shoes are about worn out. They’re getting tight. I need a new pair of shoes.”
I looked and his shoes were worn and looked tight. “We’ll go to town on Saturday and get a new pair for you.”
“Dad?” he asked quietly. “Can I have a pair of the Reebok pumps?”
He brought the advertisement over to me. When I saw the price, I didn’t say no, but said, “A good pair of tennis shoes cost twenty-five dollars. I will give you two options. I will buy the regular shoes or I can give you the twenty-five dollars toward the Reeboks. If you do extra chores for me or your mom, you can earn the rest of the money for the shoes you want.”
“Okay
Dad. Do you have any chores for me now?”
“Not
now, but your mom and I will make a list.”
He
was eager and worked diligently. Most chores earned a dollar to three dollars
depending on how long and how hard he worked.
After
about a week and a half, he came to me and said, “Okay Dad. Let’s go and buy
the tennis shoes you offered to buy for me.”
I
think there were three things that changed his mind. Earning the money was
slower and harder than he thought, the second was his shoes did look shabby,
and thirdly and probably the most influential factor was his shoes were getting
more and more tight as his feet grew.
We
climbed into the car and went shopping for shoes.
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