What Is It

 

What Is It

I’m trying to understand what’s going on with my body. Small changes are creeping in. Over the past week or so, my balance has ben off just a bit. It’s not anything major, but I must be a little more careful with walking, turning, and leaning over. I don’t feel as stable on my feet recently.

Yesterday aching in my joints have become more pronounced. My knees and hips have decided to hurt evem when not being used. I find that even sitting in a chair I may need to reposition myself to relieve the deep aching in my hips especially. I’ve been trying to believe that it’s a part of aging, but I am beginning to doubt that.

I almost lost my balance reaching for something and had to catch myself to prevent a fall I jammed my deformed “arthritic” finger into a wooden cupboard. That intensified the usual ache in my pinky finger to a much higher level.

Last night I had a serial dream. I know that I woke several times to reposition my aching joints, but fell back to sleep only to dream again. The dream was odd, not just because it was a long-running dream, but also because it was vivid and I couldn’t remember much about it. I can recall the color green and the feeling that I was being tossed and buffeted. What was the cause of the turmoil, I have no idea, but waking this morning my muscles ached. The muscles that ached weren’t just my arms and legs as if I had done a long day’s work, but even the muscles across my belly.

About a month ago I started to take a trial medication. Because of my history of cardiac problems, the nurse who is responsible for the trial studies thought I might be a good candidate for this study. Now I’m trying to sort out if my aching joints, my muscle pain, and the disequilibrium are the side effects of the medication or whether something else is happening.

I’ll call my nurse handler later today to see if I should continue with the trial or stop taking the medications.